My boyfriend in his 40s finally got diagnosed with ADHD by a psychologist after suffering his whole life. The psychologist recommended stimulant medication.
Now he’s talking to a nurse, and has been prescribed a few different drugs that have helped some with his anxiety (gabapentin, zyprexa, the occasional xanax), but she refuses to prescribe a stimulant to address the ADHD because “it might make his anxiety worse”.
Why the fuck do you think he has anxiety? Could it be because he has had unmedicated ADHD for DECADES, and every time he tries to concentrate to complete a task, he can’t? And every time he tries to not dwell on bad thoughts and bad memories, he can’t make himself think about anything else, so he spirals downward? Because his ADHD is unmedicated? Jesus Christ.
Sorry for the long rant. We’ve been seeing her for a few months, but I’m losing hope that the actual problem is ever going to be addressed.
TL;DR: I wish I could get my bf into the category of “older person with ADHD taking stimulants”.
My biggest problems here are the phrases “no objections” and “evolve”.
“No objections” is unhealthily controlling. You absolutely can object, and it’s gross that he seems to think you can’t.
“Evolve” makes it sound like people who don’t go on dates are somehow not as human as the rest of society, and are not doing what they’re “supposed” to be doing. I don’t like that either. It strikes me as being in the same vein as how you’re “supposed” to be heterosexual, and get married, and have children. Because that’s what “normal” humans do.
If those two phrases weren’t in the response, I’d find the situation weird, but not overall objectionable.
It’s your dad’s attitude toward you that feels wrong, not the date itself.