You forgot the one little fact that said virgin was 13 at the time of impregnation.
~PS. Epstein didn’t kill himself.~
It gets better.
The Greek word that’s eventually translated to English “virgin” means unwed. (I have no source at hand to support that.)
Let’s employ Occam’s razor.
Mary (lit. Beloved) is just some dirt poor farmers daughter who got knocked up and ran away to the next village with her boy friend. Gave birth in a barn.
Then 25 years later this dude shows up again, a carpenter by trade, and is a total hippie.
Then all his mates write down his adventures in letters to each other.
The plot of The Hobbit?
I hear this Jesus guy is a pretty big deal with the Republicans. He’s probably on that list they won’t release.
Apparently, he is too woke for them now, but still go worship a woke god every week.
he is too woke for them now
Always has been. Jesus is basically the superhero tier of communist hippie. And he’s brown. Republicans fucking hate him.
We didn’t have rules back then
Mary wasn’t the virgin, her mother was. She had to be pure that way to carry jebus. It’s so nonsensical even the followers of the religion get their own shit wrong.
What? Mary was allegedly a virgin when she became pregnant with Jesus, but that’s not what immaculate conception is about.
I thought immaculate conception was the idea that Christians had about heritable sin from Adam and Eve, and that when Mary was conceived the sin associated with humanity in general skipped her somehow. Virgin birth, something separate, was Mary making Jesus via parthogenesis and Bible magic. Someone correct me if I’m wrong I grew up in a cult so I got half of this off the internet.
It varies by denomination.
Explaining crazy with crazier is pretty crazy. Just saying.
Right, but the mythology is pretty clear about her being a virgin.
Mary cheats on her husband, gets pregnant, convinces the dumbass that it was some magic ghost that gave them a magic baby, and accidentally created a religion.
…woulda prevented a lot of problems had she just owned up to it >_<
I’ve read somewhere (don’t remember where sorry about that) Mary wasn’t a virgin, and Joseph was definitely Jesus’ father until some much later time when some pope decided that sex with women was gross and tweaked the story.
“Virgin birth” was already a concept with other dieties. Christians just absorbed myths.
Probably sooner than that. The “Pope” as we know it is an office that evolved later, though the Catholic church claims the line goes back to the Apostle Peter.
The stories in the gospels are a collection of stories that had been circulating orally among the first century Christians, and got written down mostly in the late second half of that century. Mary likely never claimed a virgin birth at all; that was invented by the oral tradition. Pretty much everything about Jesus childhood is made up to push certain religious narratives.
Which itself is sometimes interesting to follow. The whole census story behind Jesus birth, for instance, is almost certainly made up. Why would Rome require everyone to go back to their birth city to register? That’s hugely disruptive to everyday life if people have to travel days or weeks just to fill out some paperwork. But why did they stick that in there? One good answer is that the particular group who wrote that section of the gospels–it doesn’t appear in all of them–really wanted to connect Jesus to King David and Bethlehem, but everyone knows Jesus is from Nazareth. So they stick this convoluted census story in there to have a reason for Jesus to be born in Bethlehem instead of Nazareth.
Some other person would have done the same thing. This is just the words that survived.
Not just a virgin, a young teen. A child.
Republicans just following gods teachings.
Now let’s have a quick snack I’ve prepared from myself. I’m also made of bread and wine.
Dear Jesus, why you gotta do me like that?
Remember this is still the nice version. The OT is the “we mean business” half. Honestly re-reading some of the OT stories as an adult is fucking wild, and kind of fun if you treat it as mythology. Its still fucked up don’t me wrong. Tho I sometimes think it would be fun to watch an HBO mini series about the OT. Like the story of Samsung is just wild.
You mean Samson? Autocorrect is a bitch.
Yes lol
